Making Sense of It All

“What we have once enjoyed we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us.” — Helen Keller

You’ve probably heard the story of the adventure that Jerry Collins and I had in New England. I received a promotion and job transfer from La Jolla to Boston in January, 1994.

You can imagine what Boston looks like in January. And the winter of 1994 was the coldest and snowiest (is that a word?) in the history of the city. So we arrived in the ice and snow, with basically no idea where to find a place
to live. But Spirit knew. We were Divinely guided to an apartment complex in Quincy, on the south shore of the Boston area. The rental agent on duty that Saturday would become a fast friend.

In a strange city in a strange climate there are things that must be done immediately, such as buying a cold weather car battery (who knew?). Pat McHugh was immediately welcoming and nurturing, and kindly advised us on where to go and what to do.

During the 18 months of our time in Quincy, we spent alot of time with Pat and her two sons. Pat’s full-time job was as a Catholic school teacher, which always amused us because she was the least Catholic Catholic we could have imagined.

Over the years, we had many wonderful adventures together. Pat’s first trip to California was during the time we lived there, to attend a surprise birthday party I created for Jerry C.’s 30th birthday. We traveled all over the northeast together, as well as to Colorado, Hawaii, and Europe.

Pat experienced several health challenges, including breast cancer in the 1990’s, neck surgery three years ago, and the diagnosis of pancreatic cancer about 18 months ago. We had a fabulous visit with Pat in April (including running around in a fabulous late season snow storm!), and knew that it was possible for her to walk through
this experience and go on. But it was her path to not do so, and she made her transition
early this morning.

We want the people we love to be with us for a long, long time. But that is not always what they came here to do. When they leave us before we are ready, all we can do is love them, forgive them if we need to, and know that they will be in our hearts forever.

(So it is with Caylee Anthony. If you find yourself caught up in the drama of this situation in Florida, please consider that we live in an olderly universe. Not everyone is supposed to be here for 90 or 100 years. There are no victims).

Please join me in holding Pat’s family and dear ones in Love and Light during this transition period.

About revjerryt

I offer spiritual counseling around healing issues related to relationships (with our Higher Power, ourselves and family), coming out (regardless of sexual orientation), and other concerns. I am a Religious Science / New Thought Minister living in the San Diego area, and senior minister of Joyful Living Spiritual Center, meeting at the Days Hotel (543 Hotel Circle South, Mission Valley/San Diego) in the East Wing Meeting Room on the second floor. Learn more at Other services include weddings, holy unions, baby blessings, baptisms, and memorial services. Learn more about me, and my book, at I am also the founder of the LGBTQ Spiritual Summit, bringing members of the gay and lesbian community together with leaders of various religious denominations and spiritual traditions, in order to start the conversation about healing. Learn more at
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1 Response to Making Sense of It All

  1. Noreen says:

    Waiting to meet her again in another venue. I know it will happen. A wonderful woman who touched so many. It was an absolute joy to call her friend.

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